Everything seems to have to be tested and challenged nowadays. We can't say we are faithful until our loyalty is tested. We can't say we are wise until our wisdom is needed. We can't say a friend is a friend indeed until that person has proven to be so. And we can't say our family has a strong bond until that bond is put to the real test.
I don't mean to get too personal here, but I just learned this the hard way. When everything is alright, when there is no problem/trouble, we can find friends anywhere. Because those are the guys we hang out with, go to movies together, eat out together, people we do fun stuffs with. But when we are in trouble (say, financial trouble) and we don't have the money to spend for fun anymore, those 'friends' suddenly disappear. Okay, that's not too odd. What I find really odd is even brothers/sisters can disappear too. It's odd because I always thought a family is a family. Whatever trouble you are in, you're supposed to back each other up. Don't get me wrong. I'm not talking about financial aid or anything like that. I am not asking for that at all. What makes me wonder is that they never ask about our situation, knowing that we really are in financial trouble. None of them ever call to ask, 'hey, how's it going with the new business?' or just a simple 'how are you?'. I just find it fascinating weird, because I used to think this is a family with the strongest bond that no one can ever break. I was totally wrong. Honestly, we are like strangers now.
Well anyway, I really don't want to be over-sensitive about this. I just want to share the lesson I learned. We never know how strong a relationship is (even siblings-relationship) until there are waves come crashing down on it. But now that I know, I say to myself: I will not do this to my friends or my families who are in need. I will not turn my back on them. I might not have the money to help out, but I still have words of encouragement that I can share.
I hope you guys have a stronger family than mine. And please be good to your family and friends. They're all you've got after all.
16.5.09
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uhh.... chill, dun get so emotional... :) cheer up! :)
ReplyDeleteJan,
ReplyDeleteI think part of the problem is that people don't know how to react or what to say. If they are uncomfortable with a situation they will avoid the situation.
An example is a friend who lost her husband. Suddenly all her married friends stopped coming to visit.
You are an exception to the rule and I try to be the same as you, it is so difficult to change human nature.
SQ
SQ: Yes, I suppose that is human nature and we can't do anything to change that. I just thought that families were supposed to be there and offer support, not to turn away and just pretend everything is okay. I get it if friends disappear, but family? I just find it odd, that's all :)
ReplyDeleteZeth: yeah, thanks. I'll try to do that :)
huaaaa... saia sedihhh.. note : i am not offended by u since u told me earlier who are u talkin bout hohohohohohoh...
ReplyDeletecheer up, sis~! u can do it!
lots lots of love~ je tu manque ~
Good Morning! You have won an award for sharing your honesty and your thoughts. Please stop by my blog where you can pick it up! You will find it in my daily postings. Copy it over to your blog and pay it forward! Great Day!
ReplyDeleteHey! I've got an award for you as well. Two awards in one day, that should be a little pick-me-up. Thank you for sharing your life - it helps to know I'm not alone in some of my thoughts.
ReplyDeletePlease stop by my gardening blog to pick it up.
http://goofygardener.blogspot.com/2009/05/you-like-me.html
It sounds like we might be distant cousins, I understand completly. During some financial difficulties we had my family just kind of looked down on us almost worse than pity and it has never changed since then. I have vowed to always support my daughter no matter what. You never know what can happen.
ReplyDeleteNice piece thanks
Anne